Priceless Poop

  • Artist: Mr. Beany’s Bitty Band
  • Album: 50/90 2018
  • Track: 5
  • Year: 2018
  • Title: Priceless Poop
  • Album Artist: Mr. Beany’s Bitty Band
  • Poet: S.W. Black
  • Genres:
    • crapcapella
    • improvisation

Lyrics

Would you like to buy my poop?
I’ve heard it doesn’t have a price.
Would you like to buy my poop?
I think that means it’s priceless.

My poop I make it, just like the golden goose.
My poop I make it, it’s really not very loose.
I think I would like to sell you my poop.
It’s really, really priceless.
(But I’ll let it go cheap!)

I think I would like to
sell my poop, poop, poop.
I think I would like to
sell a lot of poop.

Would you like, perhaps a tonne,
metric or imperial is fine!
Let’s just sell some of my poop
because I have so much, much, much of it.

I think I make too much.
I think I really make quite a lot,
but since I have so much, much, much of it
perhaps I will let it go on sale today.

Would you like to buy my poop?
It’s really quality poop, poop, poop, poop.
Would you like to buy my poop?
It is basically priceless.

If something is priceless,
then it has no price.
If something is priceless,
then it can’t be bought.

But I am willing to sell my poop.
I am willing to sell quite a bit of it.
I won’t quite sell all of it
because some of it’s not ready.
I won’t sell the part of it
that is still inside my belly.

But I have so much poop, poop, poop, poop.
And I’m ready to let some of it on go.
I have so much poop, poop, poop, poop.
And I’m ready to sell it for a nice, fair price.

I know I said it was priceless, and it’s true!
But I’m willing to sell it cheaper than that.
I know that I said it’s priceless, and it’s true!
But I will settle for 59.95.

59.95
for a block of poop, poop, poop.
59.95
and it’s just for you, you, you, you, you!

59.95
And it’s so, so, so much
and it’s true
And I hope that you like it lots!

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