In a roundabout way, I guess you could say, I love shoes. In a roundabout way, I guess you could say, it's because I have feet. I've had feet all my life, oh yes. They grew on me when I was young. In a roundabout way you could say I love shoes. In a roundabout way you could say I love gloves. I have fingers, yes, but mostly I have palms. I have fingers, yes, but mostly I have palms. My palms are protected when I wear gloves they're oh, so, comfy. My palms don't get burned when I wear gloves they protect me from hot cars and hot stoves and hot ladies. They protect me from hot men and also hot dogs. That's why I love gloves, in a roundabout way. That's why I love gloves, in a roundabout way. I guess you could say in a roundabout way, I am hair. And under myself, I grow this little fleshy mess. I use this fleshy mass to carry me around but I am hair. It has these dangly bits that I dance around but I am hair. It's kind of a roundabout way to say that I have no interest in dating you today.