I thought I might grab me a hair
A big old hair. A little hair.
I thought I might grab me a hair
and put it right on my forehead.

I thought that I might have a beer.
A lovely beer. A little beer.
Of course it would be a root beer,
as I don't drink any hard stuff.

The elephant it grabs my hair.
It pulls my hair. It tugs my hair.
The elephant it grabs my hair
and plays dress up in the morning.

And what praytell did I see here?
My eyes see here? My eyes see here?
And what praytell did my eyes see there
at three o'clock in the morning?

My phone woke me at three o'clock.
At three o'clock. At three o'clock.
My phone woke me at three o'clock
when modest people are sleeping.

And what praytell did I read there?
Did I read there? Did I read there?
And what praytell did I read there?
At three o'clock in the morning?

My Facebook it had gone offline.
Had gone offline. Had gone offline.
My Facebook it had gone offline
at three o'clock in the morning.

And why did my account go offline?
Account go offline? Account go offline?
Why did my page go offline
at three o'clock in the morning.

It turned out someone had scammed my account.
Grabbed my account. Stole my account.
It turned out someone had stole my account
at three o'clock in the morning.

But what did I decide to do?
Decide to do? Decide to do?
But what did I decide to do
at three o'clock in the morning.

I got in to a Twitter war.
A Twitter war. A Twitter war.
I got in to a Twitter war
at three o'clock in the morning.

Who did I get in war with then?
In war with then? In war with then?
Who did I get in war with then?
at three o'clock in the morning.

It was little Donnie himself.
He took the bait. He screamed and moaned.
It was sure to make the papers,
and it started in the morning.